Elder Mediation or Intergenerational Mediation
When parents age, children may disagree with each other and their parents over important decisions.
Mediation can save time, money, and relationships when deciding on elder care by bringing family members together to create plans, answer challenges, and find new resolutions.
Elder Mediation, or Intergenerational Mediation, is a focused, respectful process designed to address complex, multi-party, and intergenerational issues. A trained mediator ensures that all relevant parties are present in the mediation. The parties usually include family members, caregivers, organizations, agencies, and service providers. We emphasize a person-centered approach, respecting the rights of the stakeholders. In elder mediation, we approach problems by recognizing that aging is an ongoing process of development and change rather than solely a period of decline.
Intergenerational mediation can be convened to respond to or prevent future conflicts. Families can plan proactively to address potential care needs. Intergenerational mediation reduces overall family stress, enhances the functionality of support networks, improves communication, and may delay the need for institutional care. Mediation may facilitate constructive conversations between the older person, family members, and care providers in institutional care cases.
Examples of disagreements around caring for aging parents include:
Should the parent move into assisted living or move in with an adult child?
Are mom and dad still safe drivers?
Who should have the legal power of attorney and medical decision-making power?
The conversations around these topics range from amicable to civil to difficult to damaging or outright terminating relationships.
Intergenerational mediation is a good option in several circumstances. For example, a family is having difficulty discussing issues around aging, when a family has a rivalry, or when someone is usurping another person's independence.
Drafting Documents
When your family member is considering drafting or changing a critical document such as a power of attorney, advanced medical directive, will, or trust—elder law mediation can help create the type of arrangement that will diminish conflict between family members during difficult times.
Changes in an Elderly Family Member’s Living Situation
When an elderly family member changes their living situation. Another time that family members should consider elder mediation is when they are considering making a change in a family member's living situation.
For example, they may be interested in finding a part-time caregiver. Others may consider relocating to be closer to a family member, moving into an assisted living facility, or a continuing care retirement community.
A Family Member Becomes a Caregiver
When one family member becomes a caregiver for a family member. When a parent or disabled family member needs help, and one family member wants to be a caregiver, it is a good idea to get into mediation to create a plan on how the entire family can continue to be involved in the care.
Needs Change
When needs change. Even the best plans will require changes. Whether the plan involves a paid caregiver or caregiver, burnout is real and has significant consequences.
Some of the specific areas where elder mediation applies include:
Guardianship
Estate Planning
Legacy
Housing and living arrangements
New marriages and step-family situations
Health Care
Nursing home decisions
Medical Decisions
Care for the caregiver
Safety
Progressive dementias and other memory impairments
Religious issues
Family business and family assets
Driving
End of Life Care
Mediation offers a superior alternative to the court system, especially when families grapple with decisions concerning disabled family members. Instead of pursuing guardianship through the courts, which can strain family bonds, mediation provides a quicker, more efficient, and cost-effective way to resolve such matters.
Elder mediation or intergenerational mediation fosters a collaborative approach, enhancing the quality of life for all involved. Improved communication is a common outcome, even post-mediation. All stakeholders, including family members and loved ones, can engage in mediation to explore options such as money management, bill-paying services, home care, durable powers of attorney, and advance directives for healthcare. This facilitated format encourages informed, reasoned, and sustainable decision-making. Hospitals, nursing homes, professional organizations, and community care homes often recommend mediation to families in need.
Find out if elder law mediation is right for you.
Contact our office today and schedule a free consultation.
Frequently asked questions about elder law mediation:
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Prevention! How many proverbs do we know, "A stitch in time saves nine." "An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure." Addressing how you want your family or your heirs to get along is a necessary part of creating an estate plan or a will. If there are objections, they can be discussed and worked out while everyone is in a good frame of mind to discuss them.
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Sometimes, parents and adult children don't agree on decisions about how the parents care for themselves. The disagreement creates family conflict. Mediation can bring everyone together to discuss the decisions. We often find acceptable options for parents and their adult children in mediation. Unfortunately, other responses to the disagreement, such as escalating the conflict without engaging a third party to facilitate the discussion, or ignoring the situation, often worsen it. The lack of adequate response increases the potential for legal interventions, such as guardianship proceedings.
