This week I return to my monthly series blog posts about filing for divorce without a lawyer in West Virginia. This post applies only to West Virginia! Details for the District of Columbia and Virginia are located elsewhere on my blog. Previous posts addressed where to file for divorce, reaching an agreement, and filing initial pleadings. Today we will be addressing some questions about the financial statement.

Brenda Waugh, Attorney at Law, L.C. offers free informational sessions for folks who are considering filing for divorce.  The sessions are offered monthly in Martinsburg and Charles Town and provide a forum for parties to learn about the options available when considering divorce.  

In the last few months, I've been working on a series on how to file for divorce without a lawyer in West Virginia.  Next week, I'll continue in that series with a post on the hearing.  However, I'll pause today and remind readers of some of the mistakes you can make when filing for divorce without a lawyer.

Developing your parenting plan after a divorce requires planning both how to make important decisions about your child and scheduling how your child will be dividing his or her time between the parents' households.  In mediation, we are able to customize the plan to best meet the needs of each family. 

Welcome to the next post in this series on filing for divorce without a lawyer in West Virginia. Since I practice in West Virginia, Virginia and the District of Columbia, the instructions for each jurisdiction are described in separate blog posts.

If you have followed these posts, you may have taken the first steps and decided that you can file for divorce. You and your spouse went to mediation and now have a written parenting plan and property settlement agreement. What’s next? How do you get to court?

Perhaps you a professional financial advisor, counselor or attorney .  During your career, you  may have wondered if litigation, when considering the financial and emotional costs of going to court, is worth it

Perhaps you are not happy in your marriage and are considering filing for divorce.  You may find yourself wishing that there wasfor a better way to resolve a conflict than going to court.

Or perhaps you are a medical or educational professional.  You are tired of dealing with courts every time a client or student is unhappy with your services.  You are looking for another way that disputes can be fairly resolved.

How much does it cost to get divorced?  Where you live, whether or not you have children or property and whether or not you chose mediation or litigation will have a big impact.  

An important step in filing for divorce without a lawyer, is working to reach the agreement before you file.  An agreement can provide greater security and can expedite the process.  Agreements can be reached between the parties informally, through mediation and through collaborative divorce.

The media can’t seem to stop generating stories about how Bruce Jenner is now Caitlyn Jenner. I watched Diane Sawyer’s interview with Jenner about the physical and emotional process. How about the legal process? Has "Bruce Jenner" legally become "Caitlyn Jenner?" I don’t know. I do know that the process of changing your name is not difficult, but like any legal process, it’s not simple.

Legally changing your name requires filing documents with the court. You must give notice to anyone who may be affected. Some states require a hearing, and the process concludes when the judge signs the order. Like many legal proceedings, a petition for name change can be filed pro se, without an attorney. However, it may be cost effective to hire an attorney. The attorney can identify potential problems and help you through the process. Free forms are available in Virginia, West Virginia and the District of Columbia to assist you in changing your name.

When you are developing a parenting plan to co-parent after a separation or divorce, one of the things you need to plan for are the holidays.  There are an infinite number of ways to plan for holidays.  You will want to consider how old the children are and what type of traditions your family has established in deciding how to co-parent during spring break.

Here are 25 ways you could schedule the spring break in your parenting plan.

Among decisions, parents make when divorcing includes decisions on how to fund their children’s college tuition. Sometimes students qualify for an in-state discount based upon their parents’ residence. In this article, I describe how different states grant reductions based on the family’s residency.

This post is part of a three part series addressing how divorcing parents might address higher education costs.  Yesterday, we addressed the question:   “How long is a parent required to pay support?”   Today, we’ll consider whether divorcing parents should agree to share the costs of their children’s college. The laws in the states where I practice do not require parents to pay college costs, but parents can agree in their divorce agreement to share in the costs.   Consider several questions before entering into an agreement to be sure your agreement is in the best interest of your child and your family.

Is your child starting college in next fall? Today, I’ll begin a series of three blog posts about divorce and funding college expenses. This series will address the laws in West Virginia, and the District of Columbia. If live in another jurisdiction, consult an attorney in your state.

This week, two of my colleagues, Mary Binns-Davis and Jeff Molenda,  completed the collaborative law training in Arlington, Virginia.  I’m very excited about this development since until this month, I was the only lawyer in West Virginia certified by the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals to represent parties in collaborative divorce. This means that West Virginians could not enjoy the benefits of collaborative divorce.  While I enjoy a wonderful relationship with a great group of collaborative professionals as part of my practice with the Collaborative Practice Group in Washington, it is great to be able to offer this option to folks living in West Virginia.

After a divorce, families must restructure their holiday or Christmas celebrations  to preserve treasured traditions and to create new practices.  Even when the parents live miles apart, it is possible to co-parent during holidays. . Thinking through several questions, in mediation or in a collaborative environment, will help to create a customized plan for your family.  As both a mediator and collaborative lawyer, I am available to work with families to find the best solution for them after a divorce.

"What do we do about Christmas?"  This is a question that comes up in most mediations involving child custody.  In mediation or collaborative law, you can tailor your holiday celebrations with your children consistent with your own family traditions and celebrations.  Whether I’m working in a collaborative law case or in mediation, we work to make all holidays, including Christmas, peaceful, unique and special for the children.  As a lawyer and mediator with offices located in West Virginia and Washington, D.C., we can design the perfect holiday for the children, together.

Another term that does not appear in West Virginia law is “50/50.”  In this post I will describe the problem that arises when parents focuses on a 50/50 split of time between households.  To many “50/50” sounds fair—100% of the time the child’s time is split equally between the parents.  However, slashing the child’s time precisely in half may be “fair” to the parents, but harmful to the child.  In developing a parenting plan, parents who are more interested in the well-being of the children may want to change the focus from the question, “What makes this look fair to me?” to the question, “What schedule can we develop to best meet the needs of our child?”    

Many times parents believe that the child should have a chance to articulate their opinion in a divorce or child custody case. Many courts prefer that their opinions be addressed through the appointment of a specially trained lawyer, or a Guardian Ad LItem, who may interview the child outside of the courtroom.  Another option is to include children in mediation.  While this option should be employed sparingly, for some families it might serve to empower the children and bring the family closer.  Only a specially trained mediator, often working with a child specialist, can assess the situation and determine whether or not the child's participation is beneficial.  Our office accepts cases in West Virginia, Maryland and the District of Columbia and can work with families to determine the best mediation structure for you.

If you are wanting to get a divorce in West Virginia, but cannot afford a lawyer or prefer to file your case without a lawyer, the West Virginia Supreme Court of Appeals has created an excellent resource on their website that can provide you with all of the documents you need to file for divorce.   The website also has paperwork and forms to file to change child support.

When parents are divorcing after an affair, what should they tell the children?  Based on a talk given by Dr. Debra M. Nackman, Ph.D., to the DCACP, these guidelines may assist parents, working with a conflict coach or mental health professional, in addressing the issue with the children.  My offices in the Eastern Panhandle of West Virginia and the District of Columbia provide mediation and collaborative law services to families who are addressing issues of divorce, child custody and seeking a more peaceful means to resolve the conflicts that emerge during these periods.